Weird Stuff Happen in Long-distance Relationships

By AbelardoLove and Courtship
LDR

There are weird side effects to wooing someone via a long-distance relationship. It’s not only very taxing on your emotions, but you also start feeling a bit obsessive with the other person.

The problem is compounded if the other party is a popular object of attention from the opposite sex, as in the case with Lizzy, the woman that I adore. She is very pretty which goes without saying that men easily fall for her. In her case, I am not (yet) her poster boy for obsessing over her. She met this guy whom she calls The Millennial who became overly obsessed with her to the point of proposing to her – even if he had two other girlfriends.

The obsessive feeling starts with missing her. When that happens, you usually get the urge to scan her Facebook photos to fill in her physical absence. After a while, you just cannot seem to help yourself from checking Facebook just to see if she’s on-line – and if she is – you take note of her most recent activity logs and notifications. It does seem weird that you start feeling like a stalker and you feel the need to step back. The simple physical absence of a person you care about makes you do stuff that seem obsessive.

And it’s a fair warning that anyone could easily just become like The Millennial, who seem to have missed the boundary between caring and obsession. Not seeing the object of your affection on a regular basis heightens that feeling. Lizzy has already warned me not to be like The Millennial. It could really might just happen to the best of us – being obsessed.

Anyway, this is post is about the weird things that happen to you when woo someone long-distance. Shout out if you have experienced this.

[Note: This post was first published on October 21, 2016 at https://abelsantaanave.blogspot.com]

SLEEP TEXTING
This happens to the best of us. Not as embarrassing as drunk texting, but, yes, it is still pretty embarrassing to wake up in the morning and see you sent incoherent messages while you were sleeping or drunk. Obviously, this happens because we tend to sleep with out mobile phones on our bedside. You intermittently wake up in the wee hours in the morning to check your phone because you thought you felt it vibrate or sound off and then send out gibberish messages while half asleep. You try to make it up in the morning by explaining that you don't know what happened. In my case, it's the constant lack of sleep because I keep thinking about her that makes me do weird stuff like trying to chat with her - at 3 a.m. I try to explain it by saying that it was meant to be sent earlier but got delayed due to system problems.
ADDICTED TO FACETIME
Thanks goodness for mobile apps like Facetime, we cut back the geographic distance a bit making the world sort of smaller. This has got to be a priority in any long-distance relationship because you're never physically together. However, this is extremely addictive too. You also tend to do cavalier acts like: busily doing Facetime while walking in the rain even if you are half-sick; cause a commotion in a coffee shop because either you are talking too loud or you want to yank away the phone chargers of other people so you could charge your own phone; and crossing dangerous corners not giving a fuck because you are live on Facetime with the one you love. And Imagine the trouble if you are not able to talk to her as planned! Then you put yourself on an emotional roller-coaster ride or not sleep at all to troll other people. There is nothing else you do because when you care for someone, you want to see her face as much as possible.
YOU ALWAYS THINK ABOUT THEM
You could be doing any mundane stuff on a daily basis and you begin to miss that special person. It's like when you have a doctors appointment and the doctor had to restrain you from using your phone because you were busy texting her while doing the procedure. It's like those days when you get out for dinner or lunch with friends but is actually not paying any close attention because you're flirting with her on the phone. It's like when you are supposed to attend a Mental Health Wellness Seminar prescribed by your office but never really got to learn anything because you were busily chatting with her. You just can't seem to stop thinking about her all the time. How do you know you have this problem? It's when you constantly hum to the tune of NSYNC's Thinking of You on your car stereo. Well, there's always hot yoga to achieve inner peace.
GREEN-MINDED COERCION
First of all, when this happens in a long-distance relationship, it's a huge red flag. That means you are close to getting out of your mind. If you have done something like asking her to send you a sexy selfie or show you her body tattoo while doing video chat, then you dangerously crossing over the obsessive red flag. Lizzy needs to spank me on the head if I ever do this to her again. I think this happens because of you are looking for intimacy with someone who is geographically miles away from you. Digital abuse is never okay. And if I ever crossed that line, I ought to be ashamed. On the other hand, if it's voluntary, the pictures should be delightful. Or just go and buy that ticket now to see her.
JEALOUS BEHAVIOR
It certainly doesn't feel right when you constantly comment every time she reaches for her phone. Clingy and emotionally needy behavior is a sign that you are getting jealous and you shouldn't be. You need to get spanked again to get back to your senses if you do this. It's embarrassing but it does happen. All you could just do at this point is promise her to do better.
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